TO ALL EXPECTANT FATHERS
Don`t ever fear that you cannot do anything to give support during the birth of your child!
“What happens if I can’t fix the pain when my wife is in labour?”.
You cannot “fix” it – nothing is broken.
Dads are often amazing just by being there; quiet and strong in the birthing room.
Fathers play a wonderful role during labour and at a birth,
strongly and gently supporting Mum as she rocks back and forth through the contractions.
- Hold your wife or partner as she stands leaning against you
- Gently stroke her hair in the waiting between contractions
- Kiss her- it keeps the oxytocin flowing
- Hold her close
- Reassure her that she can do this, that her body is beautifully designed to give birth
- Encourage her, marvel at her strength
- Hold her hands as her knuckles whiten with the intensity of pushing
- Be her lifeline to hold onto across the bed as she gets to the final pushing stage
- Encourage her some more
- When your little one is born – be there to meet her smile of excitement and fulfilment… “We did it together!”
- Share the awe-inspiring moment as you both look at your new tiny baby together
- Then as she cleans up after the birth – sit quietly with your new baby soft warm against your skin on your chest and allow your tears to fall as time stands still for you to marvel at this wondrous gift of life, this gift to love and nurture and protect.
And in the first days that follow:
- As the breastmilk volume increases day 3 or 4,hold your little one on your chest so he can sleep better as you don`t smell of milk. Your deep voice calms him, your strong hands gently hold him secure.
- Be the strong rock when mum’s hormones make her tearful.
- Hold your baby so that she can sleep, or take him for a walk so that Mum can rest.
- You can change nappies and bath the baby.
- When Mum is breast feeding , remind her that she is BRAIN-WIRING your baby.
- Cook a meal to surprise her
- Give her water or tea when she is feeding your little one
- And encourage her some more!
Parenting is teamwork and you both give 100%.
It is one of the most exciting, demanding and rewarding journeys of your life!
FATHERS HAVE A SPECIAL ROLE
“Fathers-to-be have a special role of supporting their wives or partners through the labour process by being there, speaking encouragement and support and being strong. Their love and eye-to-eye contact keeps the oxytocin flowing.
This dad holding his new son of a few hours shows the incredible and wonderful role of the father at birth. Such gentleness, strength, protection and calmness and joy!”.
This is what he writes as his son is now 4 months :
.” Its really been a journey. He is nice and strong and still on the breast
As a new dad I find myself many times starring at awe at this little creation I have the privilege of calling my son. He has profoundly changed my perspective over life. I’ve come to realise that he does not want money, toys or things, but he wants me, not half of me or two thirds but all of me and I want to be exactly that. To see him grow and go through his phases of life I realize that I have one opportunity to enjoy this with him because never again will he learn to roll over for the first time, crawl, laugh, walk, giggle and so much more. I have one chance to either be there or miss it and I have decided as a dad, to be there for there is nothing in life that surpasses the joy of being a father, a husband and a son of God.”
Grandfathers often have a special joy at holding their grandchildren, and having more time than they may have had to do things with their own children because of work. This grandfather holds his grandson for the first time!